so. here's the thing. I have been seeing this guy and we have fun, which is why I continue to entertain myself with him buuuuut, I realized that I have never actually been with someone who I physically or mentally attracted to. I've gone for the easy ones that I knew without a doubt I could trick into loving me. I get obsessed, infatuated with the idea of people, who they could be, romanticizing them beyond belief. I met this one guy while I've been here and for the first time ever, I got butterflies the first time I laid eyes on him. Of course, he is the best friend of a close friend of mine and therefore off limits and of course, I am leaving in two days and will probably never see him again. but I want him and I want to know him so bad. *deep sigh* I should know better by now that no one can ever truly know someone else.