I haven't been on here in ages.. There will probably be a post years from now that says the same thing. I don't even understand the new layout. Reminiscing and feeling worthless are the two themes in my current life. I wish things were different and that I felt happy like I used to, but wishing never made things change... We'll see how it goes. I miss you John. I'm sorry so many of us failed you... and continue to do so.