Even though you may not understand why this is but I do it cause when he looks at her he has some sort of hate towards her because he can't have me and my kids in his life and he will hate him for me because I am not able to for I am so deeply in love with him. As well as everyone who is effected towards my change I have not stopped loving you in anyway but My world shattered that day and I slowly pick the pieces that I want to keep me going eventually I will be whole again but for now I have you at a distance because the more you are close to me the more I feel that pain again.