Muslims can have up to 4 wives, that's a lot of dildo's in the sock draw.

Pretty fucking happy there's no such thing as 'Cheese Diabetes'.

I speak fluent flatulence.

I like you, but not 'Shit in your toilet', like you...

Happy 'Straya day!

I play my Bass guitar at a neighbourly volume, so that they can all hear it...

I sent 3600 TXT messages last year, that's down 245,700 from 2007.

Some of the best nights I've ever had was with good friends, gathered around a fire, reminiscing about the times we've shit ourselves.

Just had a Threesome!!! If you count two flies having sex on your back a threesome....

KFC scented candle, anyone?

I'd be outstanding if I wasn't always in sitting.

I'm not mature enough to wear white.

Boxing needs an oven mitt division.

Life would be a lot easier if they made dust coloured furniture.

I cant believe a pro athlete hasn't drawn a cock on a camera lens yet.