You might notice a large number of people calling in sick today and long lines at your local convenience store. Don’t be alarmed. It's just stoner Christmas! Happy April 20^, or as the cool kids say, 4/20!

Your average toker doesn’t need a reason to light up on this pot holiday, and professional wrestlers definitely don’t. Just like all major sports, the WWE has their wellness policy in place to prevent the use of drugs within its roster. Just last week they suspended 2 wrestlers. Considering the premature mortality rate of a wrestler (hamsters give them a run for their money), somebody has to keep an eye out for these guys and gals. “Live fast, die young” isn’t just a saying in this business.

Now, if you think that the NFL and NBA have the market cornered when it comes to drugs, scandals and arrests, you haven’t been following TMZ. While pro wrestlers don’t get the splashy ESPN headlines, our favorite grapplers have a history of getting busted for loving cannabis.

In commemoration of today, we thought it’d be fun to give some weed-loving wrestlers their own pot strains.

Sheiky Hack Hash (The Iron Sheik & Hacksaw Jim Duggan)

The arrest that stole the magic from professional wrestling. So, back in the 1980s, professional wrestling was still “real” in that the majority of the audience didn’t know it was scripted. That all came crumbling down in 1987, when everyone’s favorite belligerent bad guy, The Iron Sheik, and America’s defender, Hacksaw Jim Duggan, were arrested for weed and other drugs.

The catch here is that at the time, both men were involved in a wrestling feud. Sheik was the anti-American villain from Iran, who was intent on defeating American heroes like Duggan. Imagine the horror when word got out that these two foes were traveling together and partying it up when the cops busted them. The wrestling illusion was broken. Little children (and men) all over the land wept.

Curtain Call Candy (The Kliq: Scott Hall, Kevin Nash, HBK, and X-Pac)

With the exception of drug-free Triple H, these guys are basically the Justice League of weed. I could’ve easily given each one his own feature, considering their legendary checkered pasts with illegal substances.

While being champions and legends in the ring, their exploits in the locker room and on the road have made them wrestling outlaws.

The fact that Scott Hall is alive (thanks DDP!) is a miracle. He’s pretty much the Charlie Sheen of wrestling (minus the warlock). The man has been battling his demons for years, touring rehab centers throughout the country. Shawn Michaels would have repeated the same story had he not been “saved” by religion.

You either love or hate these guys based on their backstage antics. Here’s Kevin Nash describing how far these guys would go to enjoy some weed:

Just for my personal entertainment, these guys need their own weed theme song. Rock band Dokken should tweak their classic “Dream Warriors” into “Weed Warriors.” I’d have that song on my phone all day. 

Swanton Spaceship (Jeff Hardy)

One look at Jeff and you know he’s high on something. The kaleidoscope face-paint, the ragged Hot Topic attire and the glazed-over eyes. He’s cautionary tale #450 on what happens to a promising wrestling career once drugs get a hold of it.

His love for weed is only the tip of the iceberg when it comes to his vices. Once primed to be a top guy in the business, the innovative high-flyer ended up becoming the poster boy for violations, suspensions and arrests. In 2009, he was arrested for major drug charges including trafficking.

What you don’t want to do is go into a big PPV match high on something, which Jeff did in his infamous TNA bout against Sting:

Genetic Jackhammer (Val Venis)

You’ve heard of Kaptain Kannabis right? No? He’s not the newest superhero or a Hanna-Barbera cartoon. The Kaptain is the new persona of former WWE wrestler, Val Venis. The man who once made a living wrestling and using a pornstar gimmick is now building a budding weed empire.

With years of surgeries and wear and tear on his body, Val has become a huge proponent of medical marijuana and its benefits. His base of operations is in Arizona, where he opened a dispensary that also serves as the backdrop for his chronic web series.

Still using his classic opening line: “Hello Ladies”, Val now follows that up by offering the top strain selections available at his shop.

High Time Frog Splash (Rob Van Dam)

You can’t bring up weed and wrestling without mentioning “The Whole F’N Show” Rob…Van…Dam! He’s pro wrestling’s weed mascot. An amalgam of Jerry Garcia, Wooderson from Dazed and Confused and Jean Claude Van Damme.

A marijuana proponent/activist, RVD has gone against the taboo of marijuana in wrestling by openly proclaiming his use and love for it. Hell, the man has been featured a few times on High Times Magazine and one of his moves is called “Rolling Thunder.”

Being one of the Godfathers of ECW, his body certainly could use some relaxation based on the extreme matches he had. If you ever wondered what type of weed RVD enjoys and indulges in, here’s some recommendations directly from the man:

Randy’s Donuts (Randy Orton)

Does Randy love weed and have a history of drug and alcohol abuse? He sure does. But Randy’s on this list because he needs to continue smoking marijuana. He needs to go from a 10 to a 4 on the intensity-meter.

It’s pretty safe to say that even Randy Orton would classify himself as a Class-A jerk in the wrestling business. He’s built a bad rep for bullying other talent and being aggressive towards fans.

For the safety of everyone and scrawny reporters like the guy below, hopefully Kaptain Kannabis can hook him up.